Behavior is Communication - What is the real message?

I was talking with a social worker the other day. She works with adults and chlidren in a mental health department.  She said to me: “Every behavior is communicating something. Every behavior, and not just the words, is communicating something.  Whether we’re conscious of what we’re communicating or not, we’re still communicating."  When someone does or says something that is upsetting to you, you can take charge of your communicaton by using this coping skill. 

STOP, BREATH-Exhale, Grasp HOLD of your right pointer and middle finger and breath three more breaths before responding. This will give you a moment to ask yourself, " What is the real communication behind the behavior?"  " What is it I want to communicate back."

This will help you to stop the knee-jerk reactions and address the real issue in a constructive way. You can’t stop how you’re instantly feeling because the stuff happens really quickly. But you can pause before reacting to examine the thoughts behind the feelings to see what’s true and not true to make better decisions and take effective action.  Contact Christine to learn more about how to do this.